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May 11, 2017 at 10:19 pm by Angela

The last few days everything that has happened over the last month suddenly hit me. The turbulant times at work, some stresses at home and, on top of that, some random virus (giving me stomach cramps, diziness and headaches) saw me smash into an emotional and physical brick wall. I wasn’t motivated to do anything more than the mundane at work. I ticked off all the core chores at home but nothing more. I skipped any exercise plans and then abandoned planning all together. And, most unusually, I lost any inclination to blog. To read. To tweet. To Instagram. To even go on my computer and pretend.

BloggingTime

It was such a weird feeling. As I mentioned in a blog post back in March, I have been blogging for 10 years. During that entire period, the only time I have stopped blogging is after my mum died. After that it took me almost 4 months before I put fingers to keyboard. I just lost the inspiration. I didn’t know what to say. Even when I did write my first post after such a long absence, I then didn’t blog for another 2.5 months.

Since having Little H, blogging has become a core part of who I am. I discovered the parent-blogger community who share tales of the highs and lows of parenthood. I joined linkys to share my material and relished having people read my posts and share their experiences in comments. That interaction at many points has really helped me emotionally. Like when Little H had a febrile convulsion and I had to take her to hospital whilst Sam was abroad with work; so many lovely bloggers read and sympathised, making me feel much less alone. Usually when I find the world is getting on top of me, the blogging world (be it either reading or writing) is where I turn. It helps take me out of myself, gives me a way to get things off my chest or assures me I’m not alone with my feelings.

So to suddenly find that I didn’t want to do any of that was very alien to me. It forced me to reflect on the time I spend on my blog and realise that it is easy to take something that’s a hobby and make it a chore. By trying to share my posts more widely over the last 5 months – and get more comments – I have started to lose focus on why I am doing this. During times of stress, rather than realising that I should just write for me, I now feel the pressure of hitting my own self-imposed deadlines for set posts. The pressure to join a growing list of Linkys. Pressure that I just don’t need on top of everything else.

So this post was unplanned. It is just a brain dump of thoughts. But it’s how I’ve been feeling and it’s something I need to change. When I am asked to share blogging advice like in the recent Blogger Recognition Award, I always say to be true to yourself and know what you want your blog to be. I have not followed my own advice and ended up finding my blog a burden; feeling guilty for not giving it attention when the thing that needed attention was me. Myself. I.

BobbleSlippers
I felt low. I bought myself crazy slippers!
They helped.

Fortunately my illness has gone. All is good at home again. The work stresses remain but I have now put them into perspective. I found my desire to write once more. But I also now know that the world doesn’t end if I take some time out from my blogger life for a few days. In fact, I should probably do it more often!

[My complete coincidence, just as I was sitting down to write this, I read the latest rhyme from the super-duper Dawn from Rhyming With Wine about the pressure of blogging stats. She also referenced a post from MeetOtherMums called ‘Who Stole the Blogging Mojo?‘. They were so relevant that I knew I had to put virtual pen to digital paper and just type for once. If you’ve ever felt how I feel then give these two little gems a read!]

This post has been linked-up to some of the amazing linkys below:

Tammymum  

3 Little Buttons   Mummuddlingthrough

My Petit Canard   Dear Bear and Beany
 
 
Tags: #BlogCrush, #CoolMumClub, #DreamTeam, #FamilyFun, #fortheloveofBLOG, #KCACOLS, #MarvMondays, Blog, demands, expectation, pressure, priority,
 
Some comments:
  1. I’ve read both of these, and now yours. We all go through it. I was actually quite upset and felt dejected a few weeks ago – I had my parents visiting then I took 3 days away with my husband, virtually a whole week without blogging. My stats were terrible! My Klout was awful! My twitter pathetic. I honestly felt like a failure. But in perspective, I spent an amazing week with my family and husband. Much more worthwhile and far more meaningful. Perspective.
    #dreamteam

    • I’m glad that you realised what a wonderful time you’d had in real life. It just goes to show how fickle blog stats are. My stats dropped off terribly last week and part of me felt sad until I realised it didn’t really matter. The moment I start sharing again I get the interaction I enjoy. I’m sure you do too. And you’ll be much more refreshed from spending the time with your family! Thanks for reading xx

  2. I know the feeling! It’s as though I lose my blogging mojo every few weeks – usually if I’m out of ideas or just really exhausted. But I try to remind myself that it’s better to take time to write something that I’m proud of an enjoy then to just churn out content for the hell of it. #FamilyFun

  3. I’m glad to hear you’re feeling better now. I do think the stresses that come with trying to grow your blog can take the fun out of it and crush motivation – and that’s aside from any health issues, which I always find cause me to struggle for motivation. I find stepping away and taking a break always allows me to come back to things refreshed – nothing suffers because of it, and I get my mojo back! #FamilyFun

  4. I have felt like this at times, I need to stress less and take a break more. But I think we are all a bit guilty of being like that.
    #FamilyFun

  5. This really resonates – lately I’ve been struggling to find the time and inspiration too. I’ve limped along but felt my posts have been a bit rubbish. Is it better to post something or wait for the gems? Who knows! Either way I’m glad to have you back xx
    Thanks for sharing with #coolmumclub
    MMT recently posted…High Five to the honest Mum blogs #solidariteaMy Profile

  6. It’s hard to find motivation to blog sometimes isn’t it, especially when there’s so much going on in life and work etc. Glad you’ve got your blogging mojo back! #sharingthebloglove

  7. I agree with you about Dawn’s post – the moment we think about stats the mojo gets affected. I have only ever written when I feel like written – I have no schedule, no idea what my DA is, not entirely sure what SEO and Moz mean but I know I like writing and ultimately that should be the reason for writing and if you don’t feel like it then leave it a few days for sure. Glad you’re feeling better, lovely and hope your blogging bug returns soon xx #BlogCrush
    justsayingmum recently posted…Pushing Adulthood AwayMy Profile

  8. This is definitely a thing! I think we all go through it and I know I have, I’ve taken a bit of a step back and realise it doesn’t matter at all. I have the one deadline #familyfun which I don’t want to lose as I love the little community we have going on but I find it a struggle sometimes to actually get a post written for it these days. It happens eventually though! Normally on Tuesday night πŸ˜‚
    Take breaks but never stop xxx
    β€ͺThank you for linking up to the #familyfunlinky‬
    Karen | TwoTinyHands recently posted…Hello #FamilyFunLinkyMy Profile

  9. I’m so sorry you’ve had a bit of a hard time. I’m glad things are better now though. It’s such a shame blogging became a chore given what a long standing hobby it is to you. But hopefully like you say re prioritising and writing for you again will help but you’re right sometimes a break is just what you need. Lots of love. Thank you for joining us at #familyfun

  10. Hi, I’m glad that you are feeling better. Sometimes it’s good to have a break even if you’ve not done it before. Glad you’re back on it now #marvmondays

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Hello, I'm Angela. I'm Mum to one small person. I'm a Techie, Gardener, cake lover and tea addict. I also have far too many opinions...hence the blog. You can read more about me here. You can also follow me on Twitter so you never miss a post. Hope you enjoy reading!
   


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